Friday, December 10, 2010

THURSDAY NIGHT RIDE REPORT & VIDEO

Nice ride last night. Not as cold as Tuesday and the ice and snow that had covered the roads for the last week vanished for the most part. (But came back while we were at the Creek!) On the ride was the hardy Mike V, Craig, and JZ Jeff, and new guy Steve, who unfortunately was out for the ride last week but missed the launch since we, uh, decided, uh, ah-shit, to take off early.
Won't do that one again - also apologies to Matt who also got stiffed by our bad manners last week. Roll time from now on will be 6 p.m.!

Guess what I almost "collected" on the way to the ride last night. Yeah, our friend here was wondering why I was early for the first time this week. He wanted to talk. Or die, or something like that. Luckily I missed him. And also luckily, but just barely the jerk in the Hummer on the fucking cell phone behind me missed both of us. The lesson here, sometimes deer are smarter than expensive SUV drivers on cell phones.

This was my introduction to our newest member Steve. Looks like he just stepped out of Tron Legacy, doesn't he?

Here's a better shot of Steve. Still it's hard to make him out in the riding costume and the distortion that the cold lends to your face.


At The Creek we all got to know Steve a little better. Out of costume and into the bar and what do you think he orders? THE EVIL WEDGE OF LETTUCE! A Bob Hughes favorite, I thought I'd never see this ugly hunk of food again, but no ...

New guy Steve, looking better without all the winter riding gear, but making us sick with his EVIL WEDGE. And look how he eats the damn thing! If that's not disgusting I don't what disgusting is.

We were all going to hurl over the EVIL WEDGE until this big bowl of crazy walked into the bar and started attracting attention with his big bowl of crazy T-shirt. Yup, everybody had to see it and fondle it. It is, what you'd call, a "conversation piece."


It wasn't long before he was being hauled over the bar so we could all get a better look at "his conversation piece," prison style. I think they've got another name for "conversation piece" in lock-up, but I'm just guessing.


Snowmobile humor no doubt. I couldn't stop myself laughing until I realized I wasn't laughing at all. I did laugh however when this guy and his buddies suggested that I "flip the camera" upside down.

THE CYLOCROSS CHEF OF KNOWLEDGE

Well the Chef has returned for a few tips he'd like to share with the riders on last nights ride. His first tip is about making sure everybody's tail light is lit when you're on the ride. While there was a lot of discussion about taillights last night, none of my fellow riders took the time to tell me my rear light wasn't lit. Thanks guys, I know how you feel know, between that and riding off while I'm getting my water bottle, and letting my unlit ass hang out on the road all night, I think you're a swell bunch.

But maybe it wasn't just "not caring" that I'd be run down. The Chef has suggested that maybe none of you know what taillights look like. Above are some headlights ...

And here are some taillights you'll be seeing the next time you have flat tire or a mechanical.


The Cyclocross Chef of Knowledge also suggested that fruit basket I was going to give you, go elsewhere. I'm thinking giving it to the State Champ. I'm sure she'll love it!

So where's my f'ing fruitbasket? Got some apples made out rawride, that would do ...

I'm leaving you for the weekend with this weird-ass video featuring some really smarmy country-style Euro music dedicated to cyclocross. I think it's another "homage" to Sven Nys, but you'll have to decided. The sound track is to your ears what an EVIL WEDGE OF LETTUCE is to your eyes and stomach.

Enjoy!



4 comments:

  1. That song probably sounds alot better after 6 or 7 Duvels.

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  2. Did you catch the part in the video where the Euro guy is running with his bike on his shoulder and his deep dish carbon falls out of the rear.....he looks back , sees the wheel and keeps running....probably thinking what dumb shit would leave a wheel on the course like that....OMG...I am still laughing my ass off.....

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  3. I was going to mention that (wheel dropping) incident. That was freakin' hilarious. Since he was running all the way back to the pit for a new bike he didn't care - it made the bike lighter. And since he was a pro, it wasn't his wheel so he could give a f-. I'd like to know how it happened though. I did see a woman in Louisville, about 3 years ago, climbing the Green Monster when her front wheel came out and bounced down the steps. Tough thing was she was in 3rd place on the last lap and lost her podium spot as a result.

    Patrick: and what does the babe singing look like after a six-pack of Duvel? By the way have you seen how much Duvel costs here? It's $15 for a four pack of tiny little bottles at Kingma's.

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  4. I love Euro country cross singers, sweet disco ball too.

    JZ

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