Tuesday, November 29, 2011


While I had promised to post more photos of the Holland Race today by this morning I found there is no need. Indeed, in the past 24-hours there have been more photos posted of this race than any other race in the history of racing -  ever.

In fact there were 100 times more photos taken of the Holland Race in 2011 than were ever taken of this woman, whoever she is, above.

There were also a 1000 times more photos taken of the Holland Race in 2011 than have ever been taken of the Hoover Dam. Ever been to the Hoover Dam Gift Shop? It's awesome, dude.

In fact, in addition to the 100,000 photos shot collectively by Jack Kunnen and Julie McGraw, and everybody else that has a phone with a camera in it, Diane Arbus rose from the dead and shot a few snaps. Here's one of Holland crew preparing the course before the race.

"Har-har-har! Wait til they try to make this turn! They'll be falling ... on their heads!"

"Where do you want this stake? How about on the low-side of the off-camber? That ought to cut it! Har-har-har!"

So, since you can get your H-Photo fix just about anywhere you wander this wonderful web-thing, or even tripping Stephen King-like into the realms of dead photographers, I've decided to post photos that express the flavor  and the feel of the race, while not actually being of the race itself. Let's call it Crazy Bastard Post-Race Expressionism, shall we?

This is what I was listening to for a warm-up. Yeah no wonder I sucked. Imagine having this thing in your head for the first half-lap.

This is what the start line might have looked like before the anybody got muddy. I'm really sorry that I started in the front row, this would have given me a better and made me more motivated to hold that wheel - no doubt.


This is what it should have looked like when we hit the muddy field. Yeah people were on their heads! "Wish I'd used the Rhinos" she said. "Glad I wore the tall socks that won't fall down, though!"

After so long in the pain cave this is what it looked like at the finish line. Everybody just threw themselves on the ground and took a deep breath. Right after they threw up.

Back at the Irish Pub in Holland, after the race, waitresses that looked nothing like the German Beer Garten Girls above, offered some sweet deals on beers-and-soup-combos. Right after they got done drinking their own big, big, beers.

While this isn't the Guiness that I drank in Holland that day, it looks just about like it. And it was just as good as this one was. - as I remember it in my Crazy Bastard Post-Race Expressionism haze. Oh to be an artist!

As soon as I was done with my lunch and Guiness (Goodness!) and had shaken a little of the ache from my legs from such a hard-fought mud-fest, I wandered next door to the WORLD'S COOLEST BIKE SHOP for the annual After the HOLLAND AFTER-RACE SALE, which is always great time to buy more bike stuff I don't need. I do it every year. Somebody stop me! Anyway, while it didn't look just like this, I hope this gives you an idea of how excited ever one was about the fantastic deals on hand.

Planning on riding tonight? I hear there's horizontal freezing rain and that the frozen drops will each have a pointed razor blade inside. Sounds great, doesn't it? Check back later and let me know if you want a short ride.


  1. Thanks, 'Scene. The rest of you Bastards looks like no ride for me. Late meeting. Damn, it was so niiiiiice out tonight.