Wednesday, August 15, 2012

IT'S ALL DOWNHILL FROM HERE: CRAZY BASTARD TUESDAY NIGHT RIDE REPORT



Back in the lot at the end of the ride Tuesday night, Big Mac asks Etho-Bastard why his tires are so f*&%cking fat. Actually those are my words, not Mac's.

Great ride on Tuesday, wish I had more photos of the adventure. I believe we had a dozen Bastards on the roll - Aaron, Scott W, BK Dave, Cupcake, Kim T, Jeff Z, Ryan Allen, Tony, and a few more, sorry I can't remember your name but I was just kicked in the head by a horse about an hour ago ... when  my brain grows back I'll post everybody, promise.

Heeeeee's back. Yeah The Killer Chihauhau is back and running better and faster than ever. While Mac lead that little Bastard out, I knew he'd eventually hook back and attack the rest of the pack. He's almost taken me out once this year, so I was keep my eyes peeled for him as we rolled around the lake. Imagine my surprise when I saw this standing in the road ahead ...


Seems we caught Killer while he was harassing some of the fish in the pond. So if he chases fish, and then bikes, and then running, would that make him a Tri-Chichauthalete?

Not only he that, but it seems that he has a protege ready to step into his paw prints - and to keep on harassing our rides for years to come. Yeah, like I'm going to live that long.



The Next-Generation of Killer Chihauhau. This is his warm-up gear. He's still riding the bench.

For those of you that don't remember Killer, here's and Dr. Adam Mac Video to refresh your memory, yeah it's a Crazy Bastard Classic, from the Crazy Bastard Video Vault.


DOWNHILL SPRINT WARNING!

(Race you! First guy to the bottom is dead, okay?)

Yeah, we had a little rubbing on some downhill sprints on Tuesday, which is going to come to screeching f*cking halt damn quick. Listen, there are only two kind of people that win downhill sprints - big people, and people with really nice, fast hubs, that are big. Oh yeah, and total dumb asses. That's three I guess, so just try to imagine which one is you. It's okay to bomb hills, for the fun of it, but leave room, don't come close to anybody if you're flying by, and remember, there are no medals for winning something this stupid. The only thing you're likely to get if you pull a is a trip in the back of the Grandpa Van if you F'it up, with me chewing you meatball bloody ass all the way to the ER. Sound like fun?


Now if I were going to get competitive in the Downhill Sprint on Dirt Road Olympics, this is the shit I'd be rocking! Yeah baby, let me load up on donuts and beer, put an orange mushroom on my head, and let my Fat Ass Goooooooo!

Planning on riding Thursday Night. We should roll at 6. If you're late there might be a group rolling in the opposite direction at 6:30, so you could hook up with them and meet us halfway. 

1 comment:

  1. Jurrien (Etho-Bastard) and Julie Boonen ... both rocking (amazingly) their fat bikes. Awesome ride guys. I'm impressed but my knees ache just watching you push those monsters.

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