Another great video by Hans Nyberg, of TenMile Media. A great look at the Stony Creek race with all its wonderful and yet horrible challenges and featurs. This is always a good looking race, situated right on the shore of some damn lake that I never know its name. In fact this looked like a cross race from another country, like it should have been called the Hoogeriskidisko Race. Hey, I rode the fat tubulars just like Simon suggested, but I still sucked. You won't have to look hard to see plenty of Bastards on the course from Nancy Lange, Cupcake, Sarah Mac, Slayer and myself, to the Breakout King hissownself, Big Mac. Pour yourself a beer and enjoy - remember there's another Tailwind race on Sunday at Bloomer Park, that's lots of fun, only no sand. Damn, huh?
SINGLE SPEED ON MY MIND AND IN MY VEINS. THE FIRST ONE'S FREE THE NEXT ONE'S A THOUSAND DOLLARS! SUCKER.
Still thinking about loading in the SS for tomorrow and maybe trying my hand at Single Speed Cross racing for the first time. Hmmmmm. I suppose this is how it starts. Very innocently with just a little Single Speed Cyclocross racing, then tattoos, veganism, voyerism and then a trip San Francisco to the World Single Speed Championship and then it's this - Portland Oregon! F*ck me, I'm doomed. Well I was anyway. Hope to see you all at the races this weekend.
Where's my f*cking snorkel when I need it? And why does it smell like ass in here?
Crashing. Crashing happens. And this year it's happened to me quite a bit. And I'm getting too old for that shit, by the way. The only time it's okay to crash when it's really muddy or snowy and I've got something nice and soft to land on. Maybe like this ...
Just saw this lovely crash sequence (below) shot by Eric Baumann (via Adam Myerson's Facebook post). It's part of Eric's Plymouth CX album. Don't get excited, you didn't miss a race in Plymouth Michigan - this is in some place called Massachusetts where it's always muddy for cross races, even if they have them in July, I guess. Anyway, some beautiful shots of a messy affair. Nice job Mr. Baumann.
Atta girl. Great guts. Nice style. I love the glasses. And the mud-stache, too.
Now if I do crash I hope it's on mud, sand, an abandoned mattress, a hay bale, or something like one of these things below. Yeah they look like they could break my fall okay.
Matter of fact I'm think maybe I could just stuff these (below) in a jersey pocket or pin them to the back of my non-and-unprotective skinsuit.
As usual the Japanese are once again leading the world in Boob Pillow technology. Looks like you can get these little (or big) cuties in a number of sizes, and emotional expressions. That's nice! I'll take the bemused looking Boob in a 9200 mm width please.
But what the f*ck are these guys napping on? I don't want to know, and if it comes to landing on "ass" I'm landing on my own, thank you.
Just in! The Best Hand-up Ever! How about an inflatable Suzy Doll for a Crash Cushion? Better yet as a hand-up toy. Watch and giggle, giggler-watchers.
Everybody be safe and a have a good time racing or wherever you race or ride this weekend. I'll also be posting up a report on last night's ride once again feature Tom Boonen's sister and other dignitaries and the awarding of the PHOTO QUIZ BEER, later today or over the weekend. Maybe we'll have another PHOTO QUIZ next week. It worked out so well.
Do you remember this white shit on the ground? I think I saw some of it this morning. And who are these guys? Prizes (Beer) for the first one in the comment box that gets them right and in the correct L-R order. Games on NOW!
TONIGHT'S FORECAST: RIDING IN DARKNESS FOLLOWED BY LIGHT AT THE END OF THE BAR
A few flakes flying around right now, it's nothing, really. Nothing like those softball sized things that hit us at the end of that mud ride last week. I predict a mild winter and no studded tires. But then what am I the weatherman? If you need to know the weather ask the weather lady. Tonight I think that I will probably be riding a bike with multiple gears unless the precipitation looks like its going to step up its game. If there's an avalanche and we get over 6 feet of snow tonight those of you who have pre-purchsed your snow bikes can break the trail for the rest of us.
I guess you don't need a helmet when you're riding on powder. I just wonder how the water in that bottle is doing?
IT'S BACK TO THE STOMACH OF ANGER
One of my favorite 'cross photos of all time, with (L-R) Sarah McIntrye, Cupcake and Big Mac, Adam McIntyre.
It's back to Anger. The Stomach of Anger in Lansing this weekend where this shot was taken earlier this season when you could lounge around with bare legs and a Heckle Horn in hand with no gloves. Word is that the course is has been ridden in and some of the bumps that started my back on the road to crappville have been rolled out. Maybe some rain or wet snow might soften it up even more for this weekends cross festivities. Hey, I've got the tires waiting for action. But maybe I should be careful about what I wish for.
Plan ahead. An embarrassing moment captured forever. I just can decide on a fram. Here I am inspecting the loose front wheel and rolled tubular on the run and thinking "glad I brought that f*king pit bike.
STOMACH OF ANGER VIDEO
If you missed it the last time I slapped this baby up, take another look - it's a real well done 'cross video shot at this year's MAD ANTHONY. There's a lot of John Osgood in this and not because he's just so 'cross and rockin' with the yellow shoes and sweet facial hair stylings. It's because he paid these guys in beer. Anyway it's a terrific video and shows you a little bit of the SOA style, though I have to say those guys aren't quite as serious as this video makes them out to be. Just look at where Don Cameron is strapping on his helmet like he's "ready to get it on." Well he may have been, but when he "strapped it on" is questionable since he showed up to the starting grid after the race was already up the road - and still managed to claw his way back for the win. Anyway the SOA is something new for Michigan - it's not Tailwind and it's not KISSCROSS. It's a whole new 'cross scene and we're all the better for having these guys put the time and money into this series to make it happen. So check out the video, and then pack the truck and make the drive. Take an extra skinsuit and when the Lansing race is done you can keep heading East for Tailwind's race at Bloomer Park on Sunday.
SEDUCED BY SINGLE SPEED RACING?
I've been toying with the idea of doing a Single Speed race, and this weekend might be the time. But so far I have pulled the trigger. I've got a nice SS, and with a little gear tweaking maybe I could do it. But then again, where would I put the damn thing in the Grandpa Van?
"Hey move over. Make some room for the simple guy with only one speed. Hahahahaa!"
Love riding it, can't bring myself to race it. Chicken! I'm just afraid if I do, knowing my personality, the worm will turn and I'll end up like this guy ...
Nice wheels. Nice hat. Nice toe straps. All you need now, dude is some skinny jeans and a personality.
Yeah I'm pretty sure if I start doing SS races I'll get all hooked on it and start wearing manprees and eating vegan and then end up in Portland (yes, season two of Portlandia is just around the corner!) where all the young people go to retire. Yeah I'd eventually look like an old idiot, hanging out on the corner, wearing a dirty yellow cycling cap and sit there looking back on a life of regret ... WTF that's what I'm doing now! Well back to the single speed story. Just checkout this video out promoting the upcoming Single Speed World Championship which looks like it is in San Francisco, is just like Portland only with more building and people with real jobs. I'm not sure how this video promotes the event by showing people on cross bikes riding around the streets and parks of San Francisco on cross bikes (but then again I do that in Chicago and it's big fun) but then again I'm not so into SS yet that I know what's cool and what's not. You decide.
Now for me this SS video below is more like it. First, it's an actually SS race on a cool-ass course. The only thing that I didn't like was watching the guy's heart rate reading like 190 while he was doing 3 miles and hour. Ouch. I guess the option of dropping some gears after a big effort and spinning out all the blood you just pumped up into your ticker ain't going to happen.
Rockin' the Ithaca cap last night. Thanks Brian! We're already salivating over the return of the Ithaca Grand Prix in 2012. Also, thanks to the time change, it's lights on from the gun - which seems to be a little after 6'O, owing to crap traffic and lazy Bastards rolling in late. C'mon man, get there on time, willya?
Nice ride last night. Quite a few Bastards out on once again a lovely fall evening with mild temperatures and extremely fast and smooth riding conditions. Nothing really epic to relate about last night's ride other than we ran into Tom Boonen's sister and International Superstar and Big Time Past Premiere of Russia, Vladimir Putin. Here's a shot of him at having "a couple" at the Honey Creek last night. Yeah, Vlad, have another. I'm really glad he's got a good sense of humor, otherwise I'd be in for some of the KGB torture shit, for sure.
"Now no more making fun of The Vlad, you Crazy Bastard, or you'll end up on the cane chair with no seat in it, if you get my drift. Just ask Bond. Now get me another white wine, and stop crying you f*cking baby."
On the ride last night, Craig, Flying Bats, Matt Gravy, Ryan McFangs, Jazzy JZ Jeff Redline Bastard, Hawaii Five-Oh Chuck, Steve B, and a whole lot more that I'm sorry to say I can't remember right now. (Hey where's my Ginko?)
A thoughtful Matt Graves at the table, waiting for Godot, or maybe a drink or some Fried Carp. Not pictured across the table, Craig Flying Bats, and Vlad.
Better shot (but not much) of Tom Boonen's sister, Julie giving the dorks at my end of the table the cold shoulder. You can almost see Hawaii Five-Oh next to Julie.
Later in the evening I though Matt was looking a little tipsy. But no, it was me!
Unfortunately we did lose some people out there in the dark last night. Luckily we now have an Official Search and Rescue Crazy Bastard Dog for the ride. We send him out while we sit at the Honey Creek and eat and drink. Here he is getting ready to go.
Go fetch the lost Crazy Bastard's Zues! Fetch! Fetch! Rescue! Find! Ahhhhh, you're just like the rest of these guys.
While there were a lot of great action shots, videos and stories from the weekend, this one is my favorite. We had great showing of West-Side Bastards, from their respective teams at Stony this past weekend, and as they say, we "represented." We were in 5 races and took 6 podium spots, in a race that was brutally hard, if I do say so myself. Before we get on to the individual stories, here's the scoop above: Adam McIntyre breaks out in a big way in the Cat 3 race with absolutely heroic ride. Sarah McIntyre takes the podium too, I think for the first time, in the women's Cat 4. Nancy Lange, moved up a step or two on the podium in the Cat 4 race, with another spectacular ride. Cupcake took home some money in the Elite Women's class, suffering away like the courageous cupcake she is. In the toughest Category of the day, Jeff Haney, aka Slayer, used his legs and his head to work over the Men's 45+ Master's Category and take the Win! Hats off Slayer, one of the best rides ever - from power, endurance, to great tactics. Finally I just squeaked onto the podium. I swear a couple of times I was going like Zero Mph in the sand and seeing stars. Yeah it was fun and it sucked.
Now for another spectacular Adam, Big Mac video. He took off in the first lap, as you'll see, and blew the race apart. You'll also see the string of riders behind him as the course doubles back. After going out so hard, nobody gave him a chance in the a 45 minute race, but he held it, and even showed some power to not only be way out in front, but not too far behind the eventually winner. This race, and Slayer's race were worth the trip to watch. No enjoy and the agony and the Cross-exstasy of Stony Creek ...
While you couldn't see it from the onboard camera, if you'll notice, Adam got some new super-power from his new team kit. Yeah he's one of the those BISSELL guys now.
And stepping up. This weekend was a giant step for the new BISSELL rider. Did I say that already? That's how the announcer called it ...
He looks like a man among boys, huh. Freakin' little bike racers.
After the ride and the podium presentation he was happy, but do you think he was smiling like this when he was on course?
Cupcake on the podium once again. You can see the women standing their cash. Seriously.
Cupcake showing Joy-Joy. Again, do you think you were seeing a happy frosting and sprinkles cupcake smile here face while she was doing this?
Here come Cupake starting a about 100 yards or more of sand running ...
And there she goes, showing great style and form. Yeah, somebody make it to practice. Well done Laura.
Speaking of frosting and sprinkles, Sarah McIntyre said she heard there was a chance of "sprinkles" in the forecast for the day, so she laid some on, just in-case.
Close-up of the sprinkles. Very nice Sarah. And great race.
While the sprinkles were cool, I think she looks better with this bling.
Here's our weekend warrior and Cross Hero, Nancy Lange who was again kickin' ass on a course that had grown men crying at the end. Another great race by Nancy who is really getting some serious cross skills in the bank. She keeps on movin' on up, and on the East side, wouldn't you know.
Here's Cupcake sharing the joy. Nice. You're grounded.
Okay, that's better. You're not grounded. But who do you think you're kidding?
Here's Slayer getting the goods, with another fantastic win in he 45+. It was a good sized field, and the his battle with Andy Klumb, who rode that f*cking sand like and animal every lap was absolutely epic. The reason only one guy was on the podium with Jeff at the presentation - the rest were all in the ER. Why do you think we call him Slayer? And yes, Jeff is rocking the BISSELL colors. Another fun one to watch Jeff.
Here I am racing trailers that aren't attached to vehicles. And I'm losing!
Anyway the funniest part of the race was when it was all over this Demented Crazy Bastard tried to OCCUPY THE PODIUM! Thankfully they just called the park police and had him evicted. Bastard.
I'll put up some more action shots later. Planning on a little recovery ride tonight and get ready for another long hard, double weekend of racing. Anybody in?
Great ride last night with lots of Bastards out including Craig aka Flying Bats, Big Mac, Werdy, Ryan aka the new Fangs McGeer, Redline Bastard plus a whole load of new people - and surprises! We must have had about 15 people churning up some pretty deep mud through thick clouds of flying snow.
Now on with the Muddy Miniskirt report.
Yeah, that's a muddy miniskirt and it was on the ride last night. I don't know but I guess rocking a miniskirt when the mud is up over your rims is a good idea. Right? It kinda of keeps the mud out of your butt?
If the miniskirt weren't enough how about wet shoes, no socks and naked ankles, in cold, (34F) mud for a couple of hours? Sound like fun? It definately goes with the miniskirt. But who does this whole ensemble belong to? This person right here ...
We didn't find out until the ride was over that Julie Boonen (pictured above) is Tom Boonen's sister! No wonder she was so tough - I kid you not. She road her thin tires right through the worst slop, without a whimper, unlike some of the Bastards last night.
In case you forgot, this is her brother, another really tough guy.
Don't worry Tom, we were nice to your sister. Not like we had a choice. She could have dropped half the group last night if she wanted to. Anyway she look happy enough after the ride. Actually she looked like this:
Julie Boonen was also accompanied by a bodyguard, sent along by her brother no doubt, just in case. I mean would you want your sister riding with some Crazy Bastards.
This was Julie Boonen's bodyguard. Nice guy, but tough looking. I'm thinking maybe ex-KGB. In fact he look a lot like this ex-KGB guy.
Yeah, that's right, Vladimir Putin was on the ride last night. It was a night of stars last night. Did I also mention that Gary Fisher aka the Fish was also on the ride? Probably on the way back from the ICEMAN and he wanted to do a real hardman's ride before he left the state.
Here's a photo I took of the Fish at the HC. It's kind of dark, but you get the picture.
Here's what the Fish looks like with the lights on, below ...
WHO'S NUMBER ONE IN CYCLOCROSS?
Have you been following Who's Number #1 video series on Cycling Dirt? It's funny while being so true at the same time. The host, what's his face, Ewen McEwen or Colt McDirtiest or something, is hilarious. Nice production too. It's so good there's no reason to read or follow anybody else after this act. This is up-to-date ranking for the week, leading into this weekend of the USGP in Louisville. The opening of this is also very Honey Badgeresque, you've got to watch it.
That's it for the week and it's on to racing - if I can manage it. Good luck to you all, and just a guess ... there will be mud, so have the fangs ready!
