Thursday, March 28, 2013

Hatching the Classics

After sitting on it all winter it's finally hatched - Spring Classic's in someplace called Belgium.

I'll skip our own "Classic's opener, which was the Barry Ruby, which has had so much posted about it already that one more thin mint might make Mr. Creosote explode. After all it was attended by about 10,000 riders, racers, photographers, hanger-ons, beer drinkers and race-reviewers (which thankfully I am not - a race reviewer that is in this case - and some of the other identities are questionable too) so if you weren't there or didn't hear about it you are probably dead. Rest in Peace, bro.

The Koala's Barry Ruby race reviews got mixed reviews, which begged the question "Are you Koalafied to Krazy Koala assumptions if you live at the top of tree? Trying to figure out what went down in a race of 10,000 is mind-boggling, especially for a little bear. Stay in the beer tent is my motto.

 If you want to read a really good review of the Barry Ruby Experience™ may I suggestion The Drunk Cyclist review posted just days ago. It's utterly Classic. For visual evidence of the race I suggest that you only need to flick the blue bar on the right hand side of your Face Book Page u as fast as you can. The 10,000,000 Barry Ruby photos that have been posted will all blur together and create a moving testament to the race. Of course you'll get blurred vision and throw up, but then again, you'll be getting the full Barry Ruby effect.

What does the Classic Season really mean? Great Beglium beer and shaky internet feeds.

Well if you are a real Classic (Euro-Style) fan you can sit around getting sloshed while trying to keep the crap internet feed going, or get out there and try your hand at recreating your own private Belgium Classic effect by riding downtown over cobbles and potholes along with stopping by the pub for a Belgium Brew or two. That's really riding Belgy-Style since you don't carry anything to drink or eat and stop at bars to refuel - or refool in this case.

Here's a video put together by Vittoria that celebrates this year's freezing-ass early Spring Classics. While it's pretty good, the over-the-top melodrama and gushy-romanticism made me want to throw up in my mouth a few times (maybe it was all the Duval I drank on the ride?). Hey, it was tough, but these are pros getting paid to do this and they can get back in the car and meet me at the brewhouse anytime they want - they're not soldiers in combat, so lets not forget this isn't exactly life or death. If you want that you can try riding through East Grand Rapids at night. 

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