Sunday, May 30, 2010

DAS TOUR DE FRANKENMUTH REPORT

Das Tour De Frankenmuth was a great race, even though I don't think they should have put both Das and De in the same title. The mixing of German and French articles to create some kind of  schmaltz herring souffle makes both my head and stomach hurt. 
On the race, I'm happy to report that my particular race was good, yet extremely tough, like a real race should be. It was also very safe. My hat's off to the rest of the racers. I was every impressed. Except for one rider who shouldn't have been there - but thankfully wasn't for long. On going into a wobble that almost took the center of the field,  I suggested he grab the hoods instead of laying his considerable, and I mean considerable, weight in the hooks. He went ballistic at my simple request, which I thought was reasonable since I was planning on ending up in the Beer Garden, not the ER, later in the day. Rather than thank me, he went Johnny Cash on me (pictured above). Finger in the face, he was screaming profanities at me all the way -  as he fell off the back like a rock dropping down a well.

On happier note, I'd like to wish everyone a great Memorial Day, enjoying  time with the family and taking a moment to remember our troops. I also want to let you know that since going on about how much I love Lederhosen, it has turned into a national fashion craze (in my own mind). This Memorial Day weekend everyone will be wearing the now popular Lederhosen Bathing Suits from Beach to SPF shining and slathered beach in America. I just hope Germans won't be offended - it's has nothing to do with remembering VE Day. It's just an appropriation of coincidence. Here's a guy modeling the shorts I just ordered, above. (I don't think they'll fit though). I 'm also ordering his hair to match the outfit. I'm practicing sweeping it back out of my eyes to get the same hot look.
 
Speaking of Das Hottie, Kaat has also ordered a two piece Lederhosen bathing suit for the pool side barbecue that will run continuously from Sunday through Monday at the Crazy Bastard Summer Compound. I think it looks Lederhosenrific on her, don't you? But what I really want to know is what happened to the pig tails?

3 comments:

  1. What the heckare those legs doing coming out of the cement on the bottom pic? That doesn't qualify as lederhosenrific but maybe it's where the pic tails went. Great post Surly! I hope Das Beer Tent was good after the race.

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  2. Beer Garten ja! Disembodied legs are leftovers from the last lap. You know, "I'll rip your legs off ..." there's the proof of some guys hard work. Looking for some lederhosen skin suit for cross.

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  3. Where can I order these amazing things!? I must buy a set for me and mine!

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