Thursday, May 27, 2010


Okay, the lighting on the horizon wasn't quite as pretty or as shocking as this, but there were significant spikes coming down as we towed the line for the start of the race at Grattan last night. Wisely, not wanting to see the A and B groups turned into gigantic piles of fried riders fused to carbon and alloy bikes and wheels, kind like big bucket of fried chicken from KFC, the race director suggested that we "take cover." One thing you can say about bike racers on average - they don't appear to be very smart. After being told to "take cover" both groups rolled out slowly to take some more laps. Now I don't know if you are an easier target for lightning when you're going slow - or if you're going fast - but I'm guessing it doesn't matter. Fried is fried. And probably a direct hit is Extra Crispy. Perhaps  it wasn't all stupidity on the (our) racer's part, though. Maybe deep inside we thought we could get some extra power from being jabbed in the ass with a little lightning spike, kind of like getting a buttock full of performance enhancing drugs, just like pro racers, or the dudes from the film Back to the Future ....

Yeah, you remember that one. And maybe, just like in the movie, at just the right moment the lightning connects with your handle-bars, runs down the carbon chains stays to the highly conductive titanium cog and chain, and voila ... you're flyin'.

Just like that you're sprintin' your ass off like a freakin' juiced-up stainless steel Delorean. Hey flip up the doors so I can give my hands-up victory salute and get DQd at the finish line, will ya?

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