STEAMY RIDES WITH A STEAMING PILE OF WHAT WE LEARNED THIS SUMMER ON THE SIDE

A small bunch of Bastards rolled Thursday.

A steamed up and sweaty crew from last Thursday's CBX Ride: Bob H, Craig R, Dave S. were the only Bastards to brave the humidity. But they didn't just get all steamed up from riding ...

The irresistible bouncy tent provided a different kind of cross clinic. Good practice if you're going to try your hand at the Single Speed Cyclocross World Championship.

Winner, winner, Bob Hughes is having a Sparty Dinner.

The winner of Thursday Night's CBX ride was Bob Hughes. How he won it, nobody knows, since it's not really a race, but here is a proud Bob, with his winnings. Well done Bob ... now it's time for you to get the winner's tattoo just like the SSCXWC winners do ...

First choice for a memorable, and severely painful winner's tattoo ... "Bike My Lip." No thanks I'll pass.

Maybe a better tattoo for Bob would be this handy reference diagram tattoo which shows you how to assemble your bike before a ride. I wonder, will you have to update the tattoo when you get a BB30 PF  bottom bracket? How about disc brakes? That could hurt.

So let's review what we've learned so far this summer on our CBX rides ...

We learned how to trash talk like champs in the parking lot ...

We learned how to properly crash in the parking lot ...

We learned how to stand around in the parking lot and tell a lot of lies about our training ...

We learned how to stand around in the parking lot looking cool, and that's no lie ...

We learned how to properly fondle our sweet-ass, magic sherbert tires in the lot, but not how to spell sherbet correctly, apparently ...

We learned how to post up fake photos on Face Book hours before the ride so we don't have to roll when it's too hot or raining ... where's that fake cast I had from Halloween?

We learned proper bike fit ... how much did that fitting cost, mister?

We learned all about proper CBX ride sock fashion and style ...

And we learned how to celebrate those "Big" wins on the bike with class and dignity ...

To finish off this meandering and near meaningless post, I'd like to show you what's next for the Crazy Bastards ... like the Dutch Army Bicycle Corp, we're going to have our own Crazy Bastard Bicycle Band ... pick your instrument, you already have the bike, and play on, players.